Posts Tagged ‘lady’

I wasn’t trying to sully the ears of the church-going patrons of the fish fry, in the basement of a Catholic church, on Ash Wednesday. I was merely attempting to share a story with friends. A story I must have been excited to tell because my voice kept getting louder until I was abruptly shushed for shouting “fuck.” Being I’m no one-trick pony when it comes to embarrassing myself, I followed it up by describing a character in a TV show as “quite the little slut.”


Here’s the scene. I am on a chair, standing, in heels, with one hand on the top of the chair and the other holding a phone, peering behind a low bookshelf. My cat is on the floor, crouching, with her paw underneath the bookshelf, looking perplexed. On the phone is my friend Jason in Japan. Underneath the bookshelf, is a mouse.

So how did I get here?

I am not a list maker. Well, unless it comes to nicknaming gentleman, but that is neither here nor there. What can I say? Too much organization makes me twitchy. When one of my favorite lady friends showed me a spreadsheet of her clothes, I almost hyperventilated.